I saw a man wearing a thermometer on his hat. It was 79 degrees. Lita had a party where people threw pies at her and she bought three cans of whipped cream to make the pies, but she confided in me after the party that she should have really bought at least six cans. I told Alicia that she should be in a silent movie because she has such good facial expressions and because she never says much, and she said that she had already been in one. I know someone named Uli who went to Slapsticon, which is an international conference for slapstick movie enthusiasts.
I found a centipede curled up in the cup where I keep my toothbrush.
Jeremy was encouraged to play basketball when he was in high school because he was really tall and he played for a couple years, but he was the worst person on the team and he never scored a single point. Patti’s oven broke when she was in the middle of baking cookies. So, rather than giving up, she continued baking the cookies in the toaster oven…three at a time. I saw Jenn Libby and she was sporting three things that were royal blue: her bag, her skirt and her toe-nail polish.
Jana knows a girl that found a dead owl in the woods and picked out all the feathers and stuck them all over her clothes. Sharon knows someone who legally changed their name to, The Mayor of Featherstown. These were not the same people. Shawn Creeden was almost attacked by thugs, but luckily he had his musical saw on him. When he pulled it out of its sheath, they thought it was a sword and ran away.
Leslie ate at a restaurant in the Phillipines that was stationed at the base of a waterfall in such a way that the tables were partially immersed in its run-off. Doug once took 30 Taiwanese children to see the movie Fantastic Four. Megha’s new favorite thing is tubing. Barb found a deer tooth in the bottom of a creek and she asked if I would hold it in my pocket until later. Barb and Nick overheard someone shouting, “I hate you, Grandma!” Jon Moses saw someone in public with a long piece of dental floss hanging out of their teeth.
Recently I tried to close my eyes as slowly as a cat does. But I could not seem to do it.
Guest Society #2: from The Appalachian Trail
Preface: It is a long standing tradition on the Appalacian Trail that people go by nicknames, called your “trail name,” rather than their given names. You can give yourself a name, come to the trail having been named by family, friends or a collegue, or you can be named on the trail. The ones earned are often the most fitting.
Sunset never made it to camp before dusk. Fireman always built a fire. DangerSnake yelled just that. Tim became Jim because someone misheard him and Just Dave was how he had introduced himself. Briar had insisted on setting up his tent, no matter the conditions. He almost become Flame Thrower for other reasons. I carried a stuffed chicken for a thousand miles and became Lady Cluck. Other things get named too. Sampson’s hiking poles are Sampsonite and Goldielocks. Timecop’s tent is named The Treasure Chest and Grey Ghost calls his pack Reba.
Red Glasses remembers the first time he roasted a marshmallow, it was a complete mess. Skylight and Tailbone eat their dinners out of matching plastic yellow mugs. Butters wears almost solely the color blue.
Beatbox offered Rocksteady the strongest hand hold he knew – the Sailors Grip. Genkin bulids a fire for his wife each night to keep the
bugs away. His wife calls herself No Eyed Deer. Freestyle likes to catch snakes but I am afraid of them. But I’m not afraid of wasps though one stung me on the foot. Sampson is afraid of butterflys.
A pizza shop sign asked if anyone could eat a whole large stromboli so Bondi did. Freebird broke his spoon on his second bite of a half gallon of ice cream. He ate the rest with the stub. Tree is the tallest man on the trail.